At the end of the day, it’s not really about whether you have arguments in your relationship or not. It’s about how well you move on from moments of conflict and find a resolution as a couple.
It may seem counterintuitive at first, but it’s true that the constant presence of arguments in a relationship may actually mean that couples love each other a whole lot. Technically speaking, an argument is a discussion between two people who are expressing opposing points of view. In this event, both people are honestly manifesting their personalities and ideologies through words directed to another person. Yes, a lot of us think that our relationships should always be a perpetual honeymoon stage where we’re always smiling, kissing, laughing, and holding each other’s hand. We get flustered whenever we emerge from those blissful stages and start stepping into the reality of love and relationships. We are forced to confront the idea that not everything is going to go as smoothly as we want it. We are going to have to make some compromises and we are going to have to make some concessions.
It is through these acts of compromising and conceding wherein we truly reveal who we really are as people, and also get better glimpses into the personalities of the people we are with. And by extension, because we have a better understanding of each other, we are granted the tools of mobility to love each other in ways that we never would have discovered before. Relationships are like muscles in bodybuilding. It may take a few breaks and damages to occur before it can be rebuilt to something greater and stronger. Relationships are always a learning process and it would be too foolish and prideful to say otherwise.
However, like everything else in life, there must always be a balance. While arguments can be good for a relationship, people must know that not all arguments carry equal weight. There are the good necessary kinds of arguments that couple need to have, and there are the unnecessary ones. To go along with that, there are proper and more productive ways to argue as opposed to shallow and unconstructive manners of argumentation. If we are going to argue in our relationships, we must always do so in a healthy and civil manner so as to preserve the chemistry and bond in the union.
You should always be careful with your words. Words have the power to be either a piercing sword or a gentle blow. You must always make an effort to watch what you say so that you never end up saying something you’re going to regret. Always try to stay on topic whenever you’re arguing, and make sure to never bring up past arguments. Make an effort to listen to each other as opposed to just waiting for an opportunity to make your point. If you are feeling angry or upset during the argument, be honest about it and let your partner know. Also, when you find that you are being irrational and illogical in your arguments, never be afraid to admit that you’re wrong.